I normally put a headline here.

I persist in writing this weekly rant for three compelling reasons: I'm not required to do it. I don't get paid to do it. Nobody cares if I do it. So I do it. But I know I want to stop someday before I turn into Andy Rooney. The Irascible Geezer with a Twinkle in his Eye. “You kids got it easy. When I was your age, we had to rewind movies after we watched them.” And it becomes cute when you snap at someone, 'cause you don't have any teeth. Christ. Just put me out on the ice flow.