Which is worse?

Vampire or werewolf? Mummy or zombie? Taco Bell or Arby’s? Barry Manilow or Olivia Newton-John? Monopoly or Scrabble? Mickey Spillane or Danielle Steel? Edsel or Corvair? Jeff Koons or Thomas Kinkade? Yankees or Dodgers? Weddings or graduations? Hangnail or razor burn? Earthquake or hurricane? Constipation or diarrhea? Kiss or Motley Crue? Pug or Shih-tzu? Flat tire or dead battery? Mice or roaches? Circus Peanuts or Atomic Red Hots? Stalin or Hitler? Insomnia or narcolepsy? Migraine or sciatica? Stroke or coronary? Boredom or panic? Anger or apathy; rage or indifference? Wondering or knowing? Life or… well, actually, we have no alternative.