Atrocious

We can't believe people used to go to public executions, or even that there was such a thing. But attendance was pretty much mandatory, and it's easiest to understand as a kind of edutainment. The takeaway was: “Here is why it's important to obey the rules.” An expedient way to reinforce social norms. We've got our own ways of horrifying the future. Forget about us eating animals, imprisoning huge numbers of our fellow citizens, moving two tons of metal to get one clerk to Walmart. Bad enough, but then there's this: We poop into large bowls of drinkable water.

And Sioux City is 2.6% Native American

Time was the hills around Fincastle in Botetourt County, Virginia, were covered with apple orchards. You can tell because the housing developments are called things like Orchard Ridge, and you can buy gifts and collectibles at the Apple Barn. A few miles away in Roanoke, the people who sleep where the orchards used to be spend their days in cubicles, and the apples in the supermarket come from Chile. Meanwhile, in Texas, Wichita Falls has a 54-foot tall artificial waterfall that is clearly visible from Interstate 44. The city fathers built it in 1989, I guess because people kept asking.

Self evident

I’m about egalitarian as a guy can be. I don’t hold myself above other people, nor do I judge them. Among the people above whom I in particular do not hold myself, nor judge, are the following: People walking and texting directly in front of me. People out in public in pajamas and shower clogs. People with comb-overs. People with neck tattoos. People who put a “support our troops” sticker on their bumper and believe this simple act of adhesion serves to support anybody at all. When you get right down to it, I guess I’m just a people person.

Brain, too. Wear it out.

There's collectors who buy stuff and then never use it. Like they'll get some Star Wars action figures (they are not dolls don't call them dolls boys don't play with dolls) and never unwrap them so they can keep them perfect forever. Or those beautiful doll houses that no child will ever touch, the tiny wooden rocking chairs crying out to be splintered, swept up, and discarded. And your own personal working parts, like for instance liver? Use them up while you still can, otherwise people like Jack Bruce and David Crosby will get all the enjoyment out of them.

idealogjam

People who are sure they know the way things ought to be just make life tougher for those of us stuck with the way things are, which tends to take up most of our time and energy. And since the way things are right this moment is the direct result of absolutely everything that's already happened ever, any improvement scheme would need, to be effective, to be retroactive. If I fall in the river and begin to drown, I don't need the folks on the bank bickering about whether the government or the private sector should have provided swimming lessons.

Tiny armored flying vampires

I think I speak for my entire species when I say that I do not like being bitten by mosquitoes. I prefer not to be infected with malaria, chikungunya, or lymphatic filariasis. I don't even much enjoy little itchy bumps on the tender flesh of my ankles or, most infuriating, the elbows. On the other hand, I am a big fan of green tree frogs and anoles, who in turn are big fans of mosquitoes as menu items. Fair enough, I guess. Plus, when you spray for mosquitoes you also kill the fireflies. That's a metaphor for something, I think.

Politics and geography is my worst subject.

I was in the car all day and it was hard to hear the radio because there was a lot of road noise, but I think I heard someone say that Greece might leave Europe. This would be shame, because Greece is our number one source for literary quotes that you can skip right over as opposed to French or Latin which you have to kind of guess at. Also, much of America’s best authentic Italian pizza is provided by people of Greek descent. Anyway, the only continent with any room left is Antarctica, which is too cold for olives.