This just in

When the news people ask a question on camera, they are in reality just prompting for one of a set of stock answers. No athlete has ever said, “Well, this win is all down to me. The coaches are idiots, my teammates are useless dead weight, and our fans are a drag.” No survivor of a natural disaster has ever said, “Well, my whole family and the entire community perished, but what’s important is that all my material possessions are fine. You can always replace human beings; just as long as you have your stuff you can rebuild your life.”

Skipping some details

Playing music is easy. Locate and play one or more of the 12 available notes, then repeat that process at the proper intervals. Adopt the correct posture for your chosen genre: Rock music, you stand up. Also country and bluegrass. Blues you can sit if you’re old, which in itself confers a credibility advantage. Jazz you sit, unless it’s fusion then rock rules pertain. And for classical music you sit down and you have a music stand as well. Also, for guitarists, the following should help you to determine your appropriate strap length, in ascending order: Jazz, country, blues, rock.